[ webLog ]

[Previous entry: "Work And Girls"] [Main Index] [Next entry: "4.1 Audio"]

07/10/2003 Entry: "Humbled"

So I'm off to worship team practice yesterday (Wednesday) and i'm looking forward to a great release of the weeks issues. But no worship team is there, only Manoj. We get to talking... He'd like me to start working with the soundboard and step down from worship singing for now. There's no practice today.

I get home, and have a conversation with Gerry, he asks me to call him. Seems like I did something that bothered some people. "Remember not to do it again. Oh...

... and they don't like it when someone so public and free and out-front such as you, a worship singer, is publically sinning against himself. So it seems like we're taking you off the worship team... did Manoj speak to you?"

This brought on quite a few emotions, of course. I went from being prideful and blaming 'people' for not addressing the issue with me first-hand, to wanting to change churches.... all the way to repenting of my own sin IN TEARS. Realizing the scope of what I've done. Realizing that in true Christian sense, a lot worse could have happened to me, but I do need to be humbled and 'punished' though that word is not the right word i'm looking for.

So, I will learn the sound board for now. I will seek forgiveness from those who witnessed me smoke. I will hope that if they so quickly jumped upon scripture for reason to punish me, they will remember scripture in the VERY SAME SPOT regarding forgiveness, even if I come back to them for forgiveness seven times in the day or seventy and seven times.